One of the things that we struggle with in relationships is the idea of transactional love. We are a society that seems to believe that you only get something if you give something. We seem to believe that we are only loved when we give love first. We are only cared for when we first care for another. We are only worthy when we first prove our worthiness. The problem with this kind of thinking is that it leaves a hole in our spirit. It leaves us feeling that we lack worthiness. It often leaves people wanting bad for others because they believe that they are experiencing something bad. When we seek turmoil for any other person, we seek turmoil for ourselves.
Peace and joy are ours when we seek peace and joy for other people. When we look at others and want them to be at peace, to be happy, without requiring anything in return. I used to explain this that we lower our expectations of others. I used to say that we should just not anticipate anything from other people. However, I think that is the wrong angle as well. It isn't lowering our expectations. It is, in fact, dropping the need to label or add meaning to what other people are doing. It is loving first and then desiring good for everyone that we meet, work with, live with, or even go to school with. It is losing the transaction and creating the transformation in ourselves.
Today, I will choose to desire peace for others. When I think about people who have "wronged me," I will let go of that label and I will desire good for them. I want peace and joy for others because that is what I want. I am not looking for good for them so that they will be good to me. I am looking for good for them so that there is good for them. I don't require anything in return. I find peace in seeking it for others. I find joy in seeking it for others. What we seek for others is what we find for ourselves. Seek acceptance, not judgement. Seek love, not hate. Seek joy, not fear. Seek peace, not turmoil. Because what you seek, you will definitely find.
Jody N Holland
Do you ever feel bad about borrowing stuff from yourself? You know, let's say that you have a great outfit, one that you look really good in, and you look in the closet and it is just sitting there. You look around to see if you are looking, and then you put it on. You feel great in the outfit. You are ready to take on the world! Do you feel guilty when you leave the house in it, thinking how you might be upset at yourself for looking so dang good?
Of course you don't! That would be ridiculous. After all, the outfit is already yours. There is no reason to feel guilty about using it. The Spirit is the same way. Your birthright is peace and love. It is in your life and was made just for you. It is sitting the closet of your mind right now, just waiting to be donned for a day of awesomeness. All you have to do is put it on and head out into the world. Your ability to be joyful is a decision of which outfit to put on for the day. Do you wear joy or do you wear anger? You look horrible in anger and you get funny looks from everyone around you... So, that's a bad idea. You look great in joy, though. Every day we make a choice. We choose whether to claim our birthright and the power that is freely given to us to make the world a better place, or we choose to act out of fear and anger. We go one direction or the other.
We label things as good and bad or buy into the media on why we should all run scared to our TV's and wait for instruction on how to have a sucky life. Or... we turn off the flow of negative energy, plug into peace and joy, and choose what God always intended for us in the first place. You and I already own joy and peace. We just need to take them out of the closet and wear them today.
My challenge to you today is to do something nice for another human. Anything will do. You can compliment, buy them coffee, do them a favor, or anything else that you want. Just take a moment and live into the joy that was meant for you by helping someone else see your great and joyful outfit!
To Your Joy and Peace,
Jody N Holland
Most of the successful people that I know have a morning ritual. They do a few things each day that set the tone for what they will accomplish and how they will create the world around them. When I was younger, just starting out in business, I had my rituals as well. I have realized, however, that I had given up many of the great rituals that had helped set the right tone for the day. I was reading the book, E-Cubed, by #pamgrout, and was reminded of the importance of waking up and creating my day instead of letting things create themselves.
I had read a study by U.C. Berkley on the impact that your body posture has on your emotions and learned that smiling not only can, it does change your emotional state to a more positive one. A little over 6 years ago, I had my kids start smiling in the morning for 2 straight minutes. The impact on their attitudes within 72 hours was incredible! I had heard a speaker in Austin, TX talk about singing in the shower and what a positive impact that had on you, and so, 16 years ago, I started to sing in the shower. It really is incredible what it does to pump you up. In 1999, I read Napoleon Hill's book, Think And Grow Rich, and I started writing down my goals every day. It was ming-boggling how much more I accomplished at that time. This is one that I am restarting today!!!
The point is that, within the first 30 minutes of being awake, there were a few things that I could do that would impact the field of potentiality and change my world. I was and I am creating the world around me by identifying what I want to see and what I want to draw into my life. By intentionally focusing on the things that make my world better, it is much easier to draw the right things into focus. My belief is that the good and the bad are just options. They are options that exist in the field of potentiality. I have intentionally achieved bad results in the past by intentionally doing the wrong things with my thoughts and my rituals. That means that everything that we do is a choice. Choosing the right path is just as easy as choosing the wrong one.
So, here is my challenge to me and to you.
1. Smile for 2 or more minutes every morning before anything else happens.
2. Say something nice in your head about everyone that you interact with. Yes! Everyone!
3. Write down 3 things you want to accomplish every morning and 3 things that you did accomplish every night.
Do these things for 1 week and reexamine your world. I am absolutely confident that you will live in a better place if you do!
To Your Choices...
Jody N Holland
Today's lesson from "A Course in Miracles" is that God, being love, is happiness. The further I get into this program, the more I realize that my natural state really is to be happy. Early on in life, I think the adults around me wanted me to believe that "life sucks and then you die." I was measured by my teachers, coaches, and other adults. I was told that I would be a "hell-raiser" because I was a preacher's kid. I was told that I needed to work, even though it wouldn't be fun. I was told about all of the negativity in the world and how I was a horrible, wretched sinner who had fallen short of the glory of God. None of that sounded like I was supposed to be happy. I actually sounded like people believed that I was supposed to be miserable because they had chosen to be miserable.
That wasn't fun! When we are in love, we are happy. We aren't happy because the world is a better place though. We are happy because we are looking for the things that reflect happiness. In the first stage of psychological development (according to Dr. Morris Massey), we soak things up like a sponge. Our brains operate in Theta waves, just like they would if we were under hypnosis. We are not judging the things coming in, we are simply becoming what we are exposed to. This brain mode is perfect for learning languages quickly, learning motor skills, and learning what to believe about the world around us. I remember having fun when I was really young. I remember being in another world, playing with cars, or playing with G.I. Joe. I remember the joy of imagination. I also remember being taught in school to stop day-dreaming and pay attention. I learned that the teacher knew the answer and I didn't. Happiness is believing that the world is a great place. It is believing that I can be who I am and be accepted and loved for that. More importantly, it is believing that I am loved and that I am connected to everything around me. Love isn't just a feeling that we get when we are with "the one." Love is a state of existence. It is a vibrational frequency that we operate it.
In Pam Grout's book, E-Squared, she provides 9 energy experiments to proved that the "FP" or the field of potentiality, the energy field that connects all of us, is real. One of the experiments, the first one, is called "The Dude Abides" principle. In the accompanying experiment, you ask God to prove that he is real within the next 48 hours by sending you a clear and unmistakable sign. People have seen signs that said, "If you are looking for a sign, this is it." They have gotten calls from long lost friends, received blessings in the mail, and much more. I would encourage you to ask for a sign that you should be happy. Set your intention that you will receive a sign within the next 48 hours that demonstrates you should be happy because you are loved. Then, focus on receiving that sign. You will see some amazing things happen. I look forward to hearing about your success!
To Your Happiness,
Jody N Holland
Do you really think that you were designed to suffer? Really? You were designed for greatness! You have learned in the last several months that you are both created and creator. You are a part of the divine Spirit and it is a part of you. The problem has always been that what you were told by people was right for you was actually out of line with what was always intended.
When I was very young, I learned that I was not the one who got to determine my worth. The teachers in school would tell me if I was any good. The coaches would tell me if I was worthy of being on the team. Adults, most of whom seemed pretty unhappy, would tell me who I was supposed to be and what my life was supposed to mean. I was born believing in my innate ability to be happy and pursue happiness. I learned that I was wrong to think that I was supposed to smile and laugh and enjoy myself. Was taught that learning is discipline, not fun. All of these lessons were out of line with what was intended for me.
The intent of the Creator was for me to be happy. Since the Creator is a part of who I am, a part of every fiber of my being, then why would the Creator want me, who is just an extension of it, to be unhappy? That makes to sense. My purpose is to be happy. My purpose is to live in connection and in joy. The challenge that we all face as "adults" is to unlearn those wrong lessons so that we can remember the right ones. Our purpose is to be in line with divine purpose. Our purpose is to be happy!
Will you live into your purpose today? I will!
To Your Success,
Jody N Holland
"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty."
— Maya Angelou
As we journey through this life, it is often necessary for us to change. Like the stone that the sculptor crafts, the simplicity and beauty of who we are is already there, it just requires that we chip away the rough edges. This life is not about adding to the sculpture. It is about trimming down the sculpture in order to reveal what was already there. The change that we go through is that of a revelation more than it is a transformation.
When you look at your life and wonder what you were meant to be, that still small voice inside of you already knows the answer. Our egos shout at us that we should be bigger, add more stuff, and expand, but our Spirit knows the truth. Our success comes from letting go, from matching the frequency of success, rather than the frequency of fear. Fear, in this life, is the opposite of all things good. It is what keeps us from success. It is what keeps us from joy. It is what keeps us from peace.
The times in my life when my relationships are the best and when I enjoy true peace are the times when I do not judge others. It is when I am not afraid of who they are because I know who I am. The only way that I see for us to change and achieve peace is to love, not fear. This does not mean that we put ourselves in the way of harm or that we make bad decisions. It simply means that we don't require others to be like us in order to love them for who they are.
My challenge to you today is to love others, to look for the good in them and to reveal the beauty in yourself by doing so.
To Your success,
Jody is a writer, motivational speaker, consultant, and entrepreneur. He has been the keynote speaker at over 250 events around the world. Jody speaks more than 150 times per year at different programs, and he has given more than 10,000 speeches during his career.